Am I giving My Daughters Too Much Because I Had Too Little ?

I grew up in a loving home.

But financially , we had very little.

We always had the essentials — food on the table, clothes to wear, a roof over our heads.

But there were many things we wanted and simply couldn’t have.

I remember looking at other children and thinking:

“One day, when I have my own family, my children won’t have to go without.”

I wanted to become successful as quickly as possible.

I wanted security.

And most of all, I wanted to give my future children more than I had.

Today, I have three children.

And I catch myself doing exactly that.

Especially with my daughters.

I want to buy them things.

I want to give them experiences.

I want to say “yes” more often than my parents could.

Because somewhere inside me, there is still that little girl who remembers wanting things she couldn’t have.

And that’s where motherhood becomes complicated.

Because am I giving my daughters something they truly need…

or am I trying to heal my own childhood through them?

My husband is usually the rational one.

He asks questions I don’t always like:

“Do they really need this?”

“Will this make them happier?”

“Are we teaching gratitude or simply making everything easy?”

And honestly…

sometimes his questions annoy me.

Because my heart wants to give.

To protect.

To provide.

To make sure my children never feel the disappointment I once felt.

But I also know something else.

Children don’t only need more things.

They need boundaries.

They need gratitude.

They need to learn that not getting everything they want is also part of life.

So I find myself constantly balancing between two mothers:

The little girl I used to be…

and the mother I want to become.

And maybe that’s one of the hardest parts of parenting.

Not raising our children from our wisdom alone…

but learning not to raise them from our unhealed wounds.

I don’t have the perfect answer.

I’m still learning.

But I wonder…

How many of us are trying to give our children everything we didn’t have — and where do we draw the line?